To make a difference in someone’s life, you don’t have to be brilliant, Rich or perfect.
You just have to love and respect.
Thank you for taking your time to read it!
This week a friend of mine shared with me his challenge of hurting his friends. He said that sometimes he feels his energy is low, and then he starts making careless mistakes and hurting his friends by being forgetful and thoughtless. But when his energy is high, he always doing great things and making his friends happy. That’s when he feels truly like himself.
He said that he has had that pattern for many years, and he has been working hard to change that pattern so that he can be the real “himself”’ instead of doing things he’s not proud of.
I gave him this advice to help him: he should know what it takes to be him. For example, to be Wilson, to be Jane, to be Bob, etc. , whoever you are, it requires love, commitment, and consistency to be the real YOU. When you are unloving or unreliable or inconsistent, you feel bad about yourself, and you feel you should do better than that.
Everyone has a name, but to maintain your name shining takes a lot. It requires you to transcend your pride and other bad habits, which is not easy. But you do it for the benefit of others. When you do things which are hurting people, that’s not the real you! You are not living up to your own heart’s standards. The real you has very high standards.
I asked him to do what it takes to be the real himself, then he will be able to fix that pattern of hurting his friends; then he can maintain his name shining and his friends will be proud of him. He took that point so seriously and he shook my hand!
If you have an experience or something you would like to share with other people about what it takes to be the real you, please bring it out so that we can help each other.
Four days ago I was nominated by Erika Kind for the Premio Dardos Award!
Thank you everybody for being a great audience and the time you are spending reading my stories, you are the reason and inspiration for doing this.
The Premio Dardos Award exists to acknowledge the values that every blogger shows in their effort to transmit cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values every day. These stamps were created with the intention of promoting fraternization between bloggers, a way of showing affection and gratitude for work that adds value to the Web.
On Thanksgiving Day, my friends and I went to the community dinner in Bandon City. Every year we go to sing for the people and serve them. I had a wonderful time with people. Each individual was unique in a special way. Serving people is a way of expressing our love with others.
I served a man who is 92 years old; I spent some time talking with him, about the importance serving people. He agreed, and gave me an example, that serving is the way of bringing togetherness with others. I saw people I met there last year, and it was good to see them again. Bandon has a great community spirit.
Here are some pictures of my friends and me singing for the people and serving people on thanksgiving.
When I was in Uganda I used to communicate with a friend named John on Facebook for about a year and a half. I knew that he lived somewhere in the USA, but not exactly where. We used to talk about how we can take care of other people and be more loving to people ourselves. When I moved to the USA I found out that John was living in a nearby town! I went to visit him and we had a great time together and we talked about all the things we used to talk about, but now in person! All his family members were also very happy to see us having a good time together. We started visiting each other regularly, and our friendship grew.
I told John and his family about my experiences of teaching love in schools and communities in Uganda, and I gave them a set of Cards for Living. They were so happy and they asked me if they could pick one card so that we can read it together and talk about it in our next meeting. I agreed and we planned to have another meeting to read the cards and share our experiences together.
Last week we had our meeting and we shared the card called Healthy Dependence. We talked about how we need to depend on each other, because we all have different skills and so we need to work together if we want to make beautiful things happen. John and his wife Terry gave examples of all the people they depend on and how much they appreciate those people. And how good it is that they can depend on each other.
We had a really great time and they wanted to keep having a group discussion two times a month, which was very inspiring to me.
Below is the text from the card that we shared: I hope this will inspire you as much as it did us.
Healthy dependence is a mutuality in which I depend on you and you depend on me. I am reliable for you,and you’re reliable for me. We depend on each other wisely and appropriately—not irresponsibly.
In a healthy dependence, we learn how to make use of each other, how to serve each other, and how to be served by each other. You learn what your partner’s strengths are, and they learn yours. You use their strengths, and that validates them, strengthens them, and brings out the best in them. Healthy mutual dependence strengthens everyone involved, because when someone needs us, we have reason to be strong and good and responsible. And when someone nurtures us and takes care of us, we draw strength from that, too.
Healthy dependence is a wonderful experience. The happiness of togetherness, the strength that comes from it — the wind in our sails, the lightness of step and fullness of heart. And of course, we’ve all experienced the superior effectiveness of teamwork, when many hands make light the work. Emotionally and practically, life works better when we’re in it together.
We bring out the best in each other. Only in the context of trust and mutual love will we share our most beautiful, personal, and touching qualities. We need people to inspire us, desire us, need us, make demands on us, bring out the best in us, or most of who we are will not be expressed.
A mother is tender, soft, compassionate — but without her child, that sweetness would not have come out. A friend gets to be loyal and constant because their friend needs that. The heart is full of passion, but without someone to invite you, ignite you, excite you, your wonderful feelingness remains unexpressed, unexplored, and unknown.
We have good reason to be dependable. The truth is, we find our homes in one another. We depend on each other’s feeding and care; we depend on love, on relationship. We sometimes want to think of ourselves as unaffected, but if our relationship is going poorly, we are endlessly bothered; and if our lover or spouse doesn’t give us enough love, we’re unhappy. We can’t help it. In contrast, when our relationship is flourishing, we’re happy, strong, full of energy.
We all need the nurturance of being loved, and the happiness of loving. But the only way to have love reliably is to be reliable for others, otherwise they won’t open up to you, or stay close to you. The love you take is equal to the love you make. So give the love, care, and commitment you want and need from others. Then you can be part of an endless circle of love.
When I was in Uganda I traveled to the local schools and taught the kids about love and Unification meditation, and many kids joined Unification groups at their school.
One of the most active members among those students who used to attend my Unification classes is a girl named Irene. She is very serious about learning to love. She is also doing a great work of sharing her experiences about love with her fellow students at school. I am still communicating with Irene and I’m so proud of her.
After I came to the USA Irene faced a challenge in her family. Irene doesn’t have parents, so she lives with her aunt. Her aunt’s husband didn’t like to have Irene living in the same house, and he argued a lot with Irene and made her unhappy. Still Irene used to share my teachings about love with her aunt, and that helped her aunt a lot because she was having difficulty with her husband who was being selfish.
One day the husband told Irene’s aunt that he wanted Irene to move away from the house, and said if she wouldn’t do that, he would move out.
Irene’s aunt did something very brave. She told him that Irene is not going anywhere, and said, “If you decide to move because of her, you better go away.” Then the man moved out and left their three kids with their mom.
That was hard for Irene’s aunt, but she was happy with her choice, because she realized that the man doesn’t have love—he was just being selfish. Since then Irene and her aunt started a new life together and Irene’s aunt asked me to keep communicating with her and sharing with her about commitment and love. I agreed to do that and we are still having wonderful communications up to this day.
Now Irene and her aunt are taking care of each other. Also Irene told me that they started putting my teachings into action, they do meditation together, and they are seeing a very big difference in their family.
Irene’s story is a good example of the benefit of love and Unification meditation for life. Many students benefited from my teachings because they were lacking in awareness about love. When I taught them how to love, most of them started to be open with their friends and their families about their own challenges. And their parents started appreciating me for the big difference I made to their kids. For example, the kids became more responsible in their families and also adults became more responsible than before.
You can see some of the students who were interested with Unification below: